Tomorrow I go to see the RE again. I want to feel hopeful. I kind of do feel hopeful, but I also kind of don't.
I want to hope that he'll be totally on board with trying to get this figured out, but last time I asked to see him again, he turned me down and told me again to go to the gyn oncologist. I don't want my ovary out. I don't think it needs to come out. Not anymore. I just really hope he listens to me. It's so frustrating, discouraging, disheartening, and all of the other "ing" things that are not fun to feel that I have had to fight so hard to get anything done. A friend said that it's because I don't fit neatly into any one diagnostic box, and I think she's probably right. Still, you'd think doctors would care enough, or at least be intrigued enough to figure out what the hell is going on with me. I'm worried that he still won't want to do anything, even though there are new symptoms that could help us figure this thing out. I just want to be normal. Or even mostly normal would be great. I've dealt with this for too long.
Anyways, after my appointment, I get to go and spend the night with my sister. I'm going to bring Frozen so that she and the kids can watch it. Ok, yes, and me. I didn't want to like it, but I watched it and then I did like it. Loved it, even. Wednesday morning is Kerri's last ultrasound before Aubree is born, so I get to go with her to that. (Baby 4, if anyone is counting. 1 boy, 3 girls.)
That's pretty much it. Look for an update probably on Wednesday, when I get home from my visit.
I want to hope that he'll be totally on board with trying to get this figured out, but last time I asked to see him again, he turned me down and told me again to go to the gyn oncologist. I don't want my ovary out. I don't think it needs to come out. Not anymore. I just really hope he listens to me. It's so frustrating, discouraging, disheartening, and all of the other "ing" things that are not fun to feel that I have had to fight so hard to get anything done. A friend said that it's because I don't fit neatly into any one diagnostic box, and I think she's probably right. Still, you'd think doctors would care enough, or at least be intrigued enough to figure out what the hell is going on with me. I'm worried that he still won't want to do anything, even though there are new symptoms that could help us figure this thing out. I just want to be normal. Or even mostly normal would be great. I've dealt with this for too long.
Anyways, after my appointment, I get to go and spend the night with my sister. I'm going to bring Frozen so that she and the kids can watch it. Ok, yes, and me. I didn't want to like it, but I watched it and then I did like it. Loved it, even. Wednesday morning is Kerri's last ultrasound before Aubree is born, so I get to go with her to that. (Baby 4, if anyone is counting. 1 boy, 3 girls.)
That's pretty much it. Look for an update probably on Wednesday, when I get home from my visit.
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