About my post yesterday, I just want to say that I didn't mean to hurt anyone's feelings or offend anyone. I wasn't trying to point fingers or put anyone into any "categories." I just needed a place to get those feelings out. I'm sorry if it hurt anyone, but it's how I feel.
Yes, I feel like there are a lot of things that I can't talk about with most people because they just won't "get" it. Is there anything I can do about this? No. Probably not. Am I just being stubborn? I don't think I am. There are some situations which I feel like it would be hard for people to relate to unless they've been through it, or some situations/conversations that would make people feel uncomfortable. Also, I feel like some people just would not know what to say. I realize that people are coming from a good place when they try to give any advice or comfort, but again, it's hard to do that if you've never been in the situation, so it isn't very comforting or helpful at all.
Yes, I do feel like I'm drifting away from people and becoming more withdrawn. Can anything be done about it? Sure. But I also don't want what I said on Facebook or in my blog to make anyone feel guilty and come visit. I don't want that. It would feel like a pity visit, even if they didn't see it that way. Of course I would love a visit, but I'd like it to be because someone made time for me out of their own volition. Not because of something I said or wrote.
To further clarify what I meant in yesterday's post, I don't want to get rid of my old friends. I don't want to meet someone exactly like me. I just want to have a friend closer to my age, who understands what I'm going through, who also lives near me. Someone who can just hop in the car and be here in 15 minutes or less.
I would love to keep my old friends and make new ones. I just feel like I'm going through kind of a tough time right now, and I'm getting stressed, and it's hard to keep myself going from day to day and maintain relationships. But I'm trying. Even if we have the barrier of different goals and priorities, I'm still trying.
There are other things I want to say, but I think I'll keep them to myself since they're a little personal and specific.
Anyways, that's it for the night. I'm kind of upset that I felt the need to explain myself further on this matter, but I did.
i don't know who made you feel the need to explain yesterday. it was pretty self explanitory, and nothing to apologize for. Its your feelings, and your blog. I understand what you were saying yesterday. In my own frame of refrence anyway. its not the same because we don't have the same situation, but i feel like i can't relate to any of my friends anymore. they are all married, and I'm just stuck in this weird place pathetically jealous to understand what they're going through. like i'm not part of the in crowd. :( i didn't want to tell you that yesterday because like you said, i don't really know what you're going through and i didn't want to make it worse. i'm right there with you though, on the worrying about paying bills, and "married life" even though i'm not married. i guess this will pass for us both, and you shouldn't have to explain yourself. anyone offended by your post yesterday isn't your real friend anyway.
ReplyDeleteHey there girly, I understand completely considering what I have gone through in my own life and having similar situation. It is tough finding someone that you can have long talks with that "get it." I have learned over the years though dealing with all these issues that I do not connect well with other women my age, I find I am more connected with either a bit younger then me or just a bit older then me but then again I have never really been around people my own age since high school. You know you can call me or message me anytime with no judgments or the dreaded "I am sorry that your going through this or Just relax," bit because I know that just rubs the nerves the wrong way.
ReplyDeleteHUGS!