Similar To an Epidemic

This blog is catching on. Ok, so it IS just among my friends. Maybe it's not so much an epidemic as it is just a bad case of mono going around.

Please tell me I'm not the only dumbass who remembers power bracelets. Glass beads of different colors, said to bring energy, luck, love, blahblahblah. I think I had about 20 and I wore them all at once. (This was during middle school, mind you, and bracelets were THE big thing. Also, NECKLACES!) I believe you could hear me coming a mile away. Those bracelets were so noisy, just clacking away. Thank GOD that trend hasn't come back yet.

I have to tell you, I probably ate at least a pound of grapes last night. Not sure how many Keith ate, but I'm positive that I ate waaayyyy more than him. (Can we say fatty?) Anyways, there we were, happily gorging ourselves with grapes, watching Futurama in blissful silence when BAM! Cries of agony because omg I'm 68% sure I just bit my freakin lip in half!!!! Of course, Keith found this hilaaarious, called me a fatass, and suggested I take the time to chew more carefully. Jerk. And then he asked me: "Why can't broccoli taste like grapes? Then everyone would love it." My reasoning was that if broccoli tasted like grapes, then it would tast like shit with gobs of melted cheese. He didn't get it.

He also read my blog. He says it's getting better, and that my lack of creativity in recreating an argument was the funniest thing so far. He also said that my rant was a bit *insert angry cat noises here.* No, seriously. He made angry cat noises.

On a slightly more serious note, I really wish I would've been taught more about fertility issues when I was younger. Maybe I would have been diagnosed sooner and could've been helping myself this whole time. As a teenager, I could go months with no period. I'm talking 2, 3, sometimes 4 months (I'd kill for that. Now Aunt F has taken up permanent residence, the mooching whore.) I wasn't sexually active, so I wasn't worried about being pregnant, but it was still pretty unsettling. I explained to my mom what was going on, but she thought maybe I was just working out too much. Totally wasn't the case. I would've had to be running soooo much more for it to affect my cycle. If I would've known about cysts and PCOS back then, I probably would've put two and two together when I was hospitalized overnight for crippling pain in my abdomen. They thought it was my appendix, but after all the tests, they ruled it out and didn't do any further testing. Small town hospitals for ya. We weren't aware of anything else it could be, like a cyst bursting, so we didn't push the matter. Oh how I wish we did. So, my question for you is this: Should teen girls be more informed of fertility issues? (PCOS, endometriosis, premature ovarian failure, etc.) And if you think they should, at what age would you want them to learn about it? When they start their period for the first time, or during high school sex ed? Another thing to consider is knowing your own fertility signs: basal body temp, cervical fluids (which come out through the vagina during your cycle. Most mistake cervical fluids as discharge because of an infection and are embarrassed, only because they don't know any better.), etc. Should young girls know about these as well, and why or why not? (I think they should, and I have good reasoning behind it.)

And lastly, I scheduled my doctor's appointment for the 24th. Pump me full of hormones, bitches! Hopefully it'll help my cycles become a bit more regular. And then maybe we can do Clooomiiiid!